Saturday, January 11, 2014

Mercury Enters Aquarius

Talking About Community.

Sorry, due to my current state of gimpiness, post surgical surrender, I'm convalescing... Check back soon, I'll be back...

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

New Moon In Capricorn


Read What 2014 Has In Store For You, With My 2014 FriskyScopes!
Where Will It Shake? Where Will It Be Shit?
Click HERE

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Mercury Enters Capricorn

Are You Serious?

Mercury in Capricorn is no fucking around. Fact over fiction and order in the court 24-7. To keep semblance of sanity, dose with laughter as necessary.

Nastasha Leggero Coke Money

Anjelah Johnson  (Taurus)

Miss Swan (Alex Borstein Aquarius)

Lisa Lampanelli (Cancer)

Amy Schumer (Gemini)

Whitney Cummings (Virgo)

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Uranus Goes Direct in Aries

Rebel With A Cause

Uranus is back in action in full speed absurd mode, cruising at the altitude of Aries -- which means time to get back to fighting the fights for what you feel would be for the greater good of this world. From honing your ingenious thinking to combat a disease to enforcing tough love on a wayward pup, which ever is your contribution, believe in it as it will save the world and so it shall be, so says Uranus in Aries.

Full Moon In Gemini

Double-fist It

Congratulations Y'all, we made it to the last full moon of 2013 and it's in Gemini! So, by nature of the moon's duality, double-fist all you can. Yes, under the light of the Full Cold Moon, grab all your options, because just one will never do now.

As for areas to double-fist your way to happiness:
Aries: Gossip/Information.
Taurus: Comfort/Money
Gemini: Control/Victory
Cancer: Escape/Compassion

Leo: Friendship/Ideology
Virgo: Authority/Respect
Libra: Truth/Freedom
Scorpio: Sex/Power

Sagittarius: Peace/Beauty
Capricorn: Convenience/Fulfillment

Aquarius: Romance/Worship
Pisces: Nurturing/Sanctuary

Saturday, December 7, 2013

Mars Enters Libra

Time To Own Up

Mars is now in Libra until July 25, 2014! That is major news in the astro world because Mars, the planet of determination, ego, ambition and passionate-intensity-that-can-often-be-misunderstood-as-bitchery is usually done with each sign in 6 weeks. So, the fact that this masculine and sexual planet is going to lay back in Libra for over 7 months is heavy duty. As in there are going to be no more excuses to getting balance and peace into your life in a more meaningful way. After all, don't we all owe it to ourselves to feel life in the most absolutely pulchritudinous way capable? Of course, so here it goes with Mars in Libra, as in tick-tock...

As for places that will more dramatically feel this cosmic mandate, in terms of where to make changes or look for opportunities, it is as follows: 
(Remember to read your Sun sign and Rising sign (Click there to get your rising sign for free. You will need to know your time of birth.)
Aries: Restructuring your sense of equality with those closest to you, commitments, legal issues.
Taurus: Declaring peace with co-workers, taking back control of your time, maximizing your efforts for love and money.
Gemini: Working your creativity, falling in love for the beauty of it, being justly worshipped.
Cancer: Planting new roots, redefining your sense of security, dealings with family.
Leo: Challenging your brain, being community-minded, expressing yourself.
Virgo: Enjoying what you've earned, indulging your five senses, being self-assured.
Libra: Being a genius, starting a new journey, feeling motivated.
Scorpio: Learning to better balance reality and fantasy, trusting in karma, aiming towards Nirvana.
Sagittarius: Appreciating your truest friendships, helping the future be a better place, making solid connections.
Capricorn: Moving up the ladder of success, setting new standards, enjoying luxury.
Aquarius: Flexing your morality for strength and change, diving into new adventures, discovering new hopes and inspirations.
Pisces: Owning your inner power, practicing unconditional love, getting paid what you are worth and more.

The best holiday-related watch: The Greatest Story Ever D'ohed 

Sunday, November 24, 2013

Moon In Leo

Modern Chivalry

Watch out ladies of the future, my intern is upping the bar on romance in a modern way -- by making a youtube declaration of love for his girl Nya. Who he will tell to watch this video when he sees her at school....Plus, he wanted to share his opinion on love. After learning about the reviling skywriter who wrote, "Gods Hates Fags," over Disney Orlando on Gay Days, he had something to say about it:

Lil J is 5, a Leo Rising and a Venus in Sagittarius (like me!). Yes, he's all lover!

We stopped by Nya's. She was fresh from a bath in her PJs, totally tickled pink to see Lil J. He then showed her his video, which impressed and overwhelmed her -- look at the cute couple just after that moment. (Cue video, meant to be a pic).
There were no words, except from Nya's Mom and her Mom's friend, who couldn't stop cooing over Lil J, who they already know and love. (Lil J's grandparents lived near Nya, that is how they met. Kindergarten only brought them closer)

...And it was obvious this wasn't Jake's first time expressing his emotions and from her gushing looks, he wasn't going into this blind. 20 minutes later, he told her she looked pretty. (OMG!) I then asked her if she thought he was handsome, to which she got all smiley and sweetly shook her head yes.

After, they ran around outside, kicked the soccer ball around, looked at the stars (He showed her the constellations with my phone.), played tag, pogo-ed and she put a glitter tattoo on him -- a total sign that a dude likes you, when he allows you to put make-up on him. Although, when she suggested one for his face, he said, "No." After all, he may be in love, but he's no fool for love.

Thursday, November 21, 2013

Sun Enters Sagittarius

Let Your Freedom Ring!

Yippee, a breath of new life comes today, as the Sun enters Sagittarius at 10:48 pm EST. Yes, time to turn the cosmic frown upside down -- as in saying goodbye to that deep, dark and deadly energy of Scorpio and welcoming the new guard of Sagittarius, bringing in hope, openness, spontaneity and truth. You know it, 'tis the season for flying by the seat of your pants, as it's all about learning, teaching and being, in the best way you know how. So, let your freedom ring!

As for areas per sign, sun and rising, you'll feel this surge of optimism and luck:
Aries: Keep your passport close at hand. Opportunities for the world are coming you.
Taurus: Get your freak on. Back, front, side-to-side, you'll want it from all angles.
Gemini: Believing in karma is putting it in action. To get it, give it. This time, it will add up.
Cancer: Existence is a flawed concept, so screw its rules. Stir it up now for profit and pleasure.

Leo: If life were fair, you wouldn't have been born so talented. Blow your own horn. Everyone will listen.
Virgo: Be as stubborn as you want to, as it'll make it that much sweeter to win at everything.
Libra: Trust your verbal auto-pilot skills, as words will fly from your mouth -- but their truth will set you free.
Scorpio: Luxury is your necessity now. Don't avoid it.

Sagittarius: Let your compulsions lead you and love it.
Capricorn: Escape through the rabbit-hole as many times possible.

Aquarius: If you ever wanted your own cult, this is your time to start it.
Pisces: There is nothing in this world that can't be yours right now.